I Ate My Son’s Lost Tooth


The dentist told us to expect a lot of lost teeth in the next six months.

On Sunday, Eddie’s front tooth that had been wiggly for more than a month finally wiggled its way out and disappeared some time around supper. We noticed when we had finished eating, but Eddie didn’t know where the tooth was.

He’s a sensitive soul – he started to tear up, and his face turned pink as he prepared to turn on the waterworks. My Lovely Bride and I tried to console him – well, she did, at least. I thought more of the book we have – “My Wobbly Tooth Must Not Ever Never Fall Out” by Lauren Child. In it, Lola’s tooth falls out, but then she can’t find it when it’s time to put the tooth under her pillow. Her big brother Charlie tells her to smile while she sleeps, and the Tooth Fairy will see the tooth is missing and reward her anyway. Makes sense, right?

Eddie was having none of it.

I went to clear the table and straighten up. I saw a crumb on a chair, and being a guy, I popped it in my mouth. We’re crumbly eaters, and it probably wasn’t that old.

But it went “clack” in my mouth and had no taste.

I ate my son’s lost tooth!


Crisis averted. The Tooth Fairy came, no problem, and left Eddie a gold Thomas Jefferson dollar.


One response to “I Ate My Son’s Lost Tooth

  1. Dude. Does the Ax-man eat his young as well?

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